Hooks-For-Hands Man, Part 5: "Hook To The Future"

This is a collection of posts from an experimental Twitter account, "InCaseOfHooks," which tell a long story over the course of hundreds of tweets. Stay up to date by following it at twitter.com/InCaseOfHooks, or read the previous entry here.

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• In case of bad dreams involving fires, wake up from nap.
• If woken up from nap, realize that you were dreaming of fires because your house is on fire.
• If house is on fire, look for glass to break.
• If no glass, turn on sink.
• If sink begins spurting out fire instead of water, get out of your house because you’re pretty much screwed.
• In case of standing across the street and watching house burn down, I’m sorry.

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• In case of apology from me, go downtown, because now you have nothing better to do.
• If you do actually have something better to do, do that instead.
• In case of claiming to have something better to do, you’re lying, because you’re homeless now.
• If homeless, visit mad scientist in jail, and offer money for access to his time machine.
• If using time machine, exit in the future.

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• In case of everyone having hooks for hands in the future, maybe you screwed something up by time traveling.
• In case of screwing something up by time traveling, grab nearest hook-handed person and ask how everyone got hooks for hands.
• If hook-handed person begins telling story, take a seat and listen intently.
• If story starts with a fire and is told in 140-character bursts, you may be listening to a Twitter feed.

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• If you were not around to save the day (you were time traveling, remember?), the fire continued to spread.
• In case of world-wide fire, people followed proper procedure.
• If proper procedure was properly followed, everyone ended up with hooks for hands.
• In case of a world filled with hook-handed people, use time machine to return to your present/their past.

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Click here to read the next entry.